Day #16: What Was Your Last Embarrassment?

My last embarrassing moment?

That is a challenging one to answer. What some might consider embarrassing, I see as uncomfortable at worse but more a teaching moment for me.

As I have written before in a blog post, one of my favourite retorts to my close friends is that “my shame tree has long been chopped down!” It is very hard to shame me either because I just do not put myself in situations that would cause me to be or I consider the consequences of all my actions before doing them - and accept them. Therefore no room for regrets, embarrassment or shame. 

Not since 2006.

My partner of 16 years had walked out and my heart followed. I was having a hard time accepting what had occurred even though the relationship had been on very rocky grounds for a long time. My mind was not maneuvering the corners of the deceit and disloyalty that had played out right under not just my nose but that of the other party whose partner had run off with mine.

Shameless, in a silly and desperate way, for weeks I tried everything possible to win my partner back. From leaving multiple voice mails to calling everyone under the sun who I thought could help get us back together, I eventually resorted one fine morning to going to my now ex’s place of employment to beseech and beg.

What occurred next was embarrassing to say the least. It was what pushed me over the edge – again – and my second suicide attempt occurred.

Instead of coming out to speak with me – as we had not had a conversation since the day of the Walk Out – security was called to escort me off the property! My explanation to the cold and totally disinterested Man In Black went nowhere and I was threatened with the Police being called to arrest me for harassment.

Okay, so maybe it was – harassment that is, however, until that day I did not see it that way. We had being together for 16 years for crying out loud. I had made so many changes to my life and career path to accommodate my partner, including migrating to Canada, that I felt I was owed an explanation.

That was my last embarrassing moment. Once the healing commenced, I was never to be embarrassed again. Uncomfortable, yes. Embarrassed by my own action or that of another, no. 

What about you, what was your last embarrassing moment? Share with us here or on our Facebook page.

Have a shame-free rest of the week and weekend. Remember, there will be no blog posts until Monday. You can stay in touch with us through our Facebook page or on Twitter @DOSFoundation

Namaste. 

Claudette