In order to find "love," be in an intimate relationship and/or maintain my current friendships or make new ones, I will not:
- Betray my core principles of truth always, fairness, maximum respect and loyalty
- Lend more money than I can afford to not have returned.
- Pay my partner's personal bills (eg., student loans, alimony, car note, child support, etc)
- Pose for nude pictures with or without my partner in it
- Live with in-laws ( did it twice and never to be repeated
- Have a Brazilian wax done to satisfy my partner
- Be involved in a three-some
Those are on my shortlist because I have either been recently asked whether I would or had others do to me as it relates to #1.
I have done some crazy things in my life, at the behest of others or from a feeling of "need to" in order to keep the relationship or friendship alive.
Since 2011, I have been living alone with the intermittent break of staying with a friend while on extended vacation or with my daughter while I resettled. What those years have taught me is that:
- I love my own company
- I really do not NEED a partner or anyone to "make me happy"
- My spiritual life is richer and deeper in solitude.
I will not do anything for love (as we loosely use the word).
Recently on a dating site a man told me he was very attracted to me after several conversations. Then he shared that he is a cancer survivor and his sexual performance has been affected by the disease. He said that should we meet and hit it off, and eventually decide to become intimate, I would need to inject his sexual organ in order for us to copulate. The conversation ended there.
I am not doing that for love nor money.
Another one wanted me to visit his hometown, and like a marching band be paraded around town, meeting the mayor and all. When I questioned the reason for this itinerary, he admitted that his previous girlfriend unceremoniously dumped him and I was to be his new trophy.
I will not be that for love, money or show.
One solid lesson that I have learnt is that if you allow them to, people will have you standing on your head, acting the fool for their pleasure. Many will say they love you as long as you are living according to their demands.
If I have to be anything other than who I am to be your lover or friend - I would rather remain alone.
Would you - do anything for love? What would that be? Share with us here or on our Facebook page.
Do enjoy the rest of the evening!