Sixteen months and twenty days, I was not really counting but it felt this long, after my longtime partner had walked out my daughter and gay friend in New York insisted that I joined the game.
The seeds were sown for that response in 2006 at my 41st birthday party, hosted by my partner and largely catered by the woman who was partly responsible for me now getting dating advice from a teenager and a gay PhD holder in New York, NY.
This was to have been the 'best years of my life' but it had fast turned into a nightmare.
"The bar scene is not for you, Claudette," Peter confirmed in one of our nightly pep talks. No one had to tell me that the church BBQ was not my scene either! The chickens would have resurrected and jumped off those grills had I shown up at any such religious event. Scarlett was my name and red was my emotion - angry and bitter!
My self-appointed dating expert, Abi, sat me down and gave me the in's and out's of online dating. Aside from her not wanting me going to the clubs with her (how embarrassing it would be when they carded me and not her ~ lol) she knew that:
- A half glass of wine and I would be tipsy and ready to leave within an hour
- Loud music gives me a headache
- Loud people gives me a headache and an upset stomach
- One hour is not enough to find the next love of my life
On my own, after a week or so of plenty of nausea, I signed up for EHarmony and LavaLife. The prospects were not much better except that they had more professional looking photographs and profiles.
Admittedly bored, coming out of a state of chronic depression and my self-esteem severely battered, I followed my teenager's and gay friend's "Top Three Advice:" for dating sites and adult dating:
- Meet as quickly as possible if there is any sense of connection. This way, you either confirm or dispel the connection.
- Have an exit strategy if "dispel the illusion" is the viable option.
- Check their "papers or credentials" and do not rush into exclusivity.
Yes, I had to exercise that exit strategy once. On another occasion, my job as a hospital chaplain and my girlfriend Ann, led me out. Come on, who wants to be dating a middle aged guy who had clearly not only posted his first year university picture but was at least six inches shorter than me AND used a credit card to purchase a $2 milk? Well he tried but it was declined.
Ann called within 10 minutes of the date and I was out of there within 11 minutes of the date, allegedly on my way to a dying patient's bedside. Forgive me Father, I couldn't think of another excuse fast enough.
Overall, I did well on #3 and as such ruled out visa seekers, wife beaters, and scam artists for the most part. Was not so lucky with the serial daters whose jobs and stability in other areas checked out. Such is life and anyhow, with those I saw some really good movies, ate in a few nice restaurants in Edmonton, took a trip to Banff, Alberta and stayed a couple nights in a really swank hotel.
Ready to give up on internet dating, I took down my profile from all the previously mentioned online dating sites. Ironically, soon after I flirted with, rushed into exclusivity and married a guy I met on Zoosk!!! That is a story for another blog.
What is your worst and best dating story? Have you ever tried online dating? How was it or would you? Leave a comment here, as well *Like* our Facebook page and follow us on Twitter.
Continue to have a great day! Namaste
Photo Sources:
news.mmogamesite.com
datingandlov.blogspot.com
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