I Did Not Create That! Or Did I?

"You must be flipping kidding me?! I would not have done or wanted that!"

My head spun, just as yours did the first time you read or had someone tell you that "you create your own reality."

It was simply too much for me to wrap my head around. Why would I have created:
1. Childhood sexual abuse?
2. Parental abuse?
3. Spousal Abuse?

Did not make sense then and even now, almost 15 years after hearing this and embarking on a journey to understand it, some days I am still a bit wobbly.

Case in point: Here I am, minding my own business (or so I think), traveled from Canada to Jamaica on a journey to the "what's next" of my life. Things are overall going as I anticipated in terms of my feeling of well being. Then, boom...this person, seemingly insignificant to my journey, merely a passerby, takes a strong disliking to me.

What the hell?! "Exactly what is your problem," is what I want to ask her but held back. When she is "passing through," I do my best to ignore her presence. For some reason, she refuses to reciprocate!

In Jamaica we have a saying that a person "a dash word fi you." That basically means they say things as you pass by, not necessarily nice things and most definitely not directly to your face. Their attitude, tone, snide laughter and body language convey clearly, however, that their words are all for you.

All along I either willed myself to ignore or avoid her, limiting as far as possible my need to interact. "This woman is delusional, bitter and unclear as to how she got to where she is and hence projecting her self-hate on me!" 

That was my diagnosis of the case and that ought to have closed the matter.

So why then am I blogging about it? 

I called this experience, not necessarily the person! And why? To heal it. This perspective has been itching at me, inviting me to look within, for about two months now but I kept looking at her rudeness, aggression, disrespectful behavior and attitude. Did that change anything? Yes, it increased!

Science, quantum physics in particular, as well as spiritual masters have been telling us this:

"The more you focus on something, the bigger it gets!"

It would take a couple more blog posts for me to detail how my focus has increased so many wanted and unwanted experiences, situations, etc in my life. I probably will over time.

Today, as this theme came to me: "You Create Your Reality," this latest 'teacher', because she is one, came with her attitude tun' up!

What did I do?

Nothing but took my attention away from her.  Instead, I 'pivoted' and used music to tune elsewhere - to love that is within me.

The result? Within a couple of hours of her appearance, my long distance partner called. We had not been able to speak in 24 hours, which is equivalent to eternity for us. He and I had one of the most delicious conversations ever, intensely passionate and creative, planning and claiming how we want the next few months to unfold. All thoughts of anything and anyone else nonexistent.

My nemesis has faded away. What about yours? Are you allowing your eyes to create your reality or are your ears listening to the naysayers? How about giving your heart a chance instead? Remember, that is where the issues of life flow.

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Continue to have an heart-filled day instead of your having your eyes glued to the world's reality!

Namaste

Photo Sources:
jamesdazouloute.net
vickidellojoio.com