Gossip Girl: Are You One?

Claudette Esterine

Once upon a time there was a gossip. Me.

There are few things I do well, actually very well. Gossiping is not one of them.

To be a success at gossiping, you have to not care - about anyone, the truth or if you get broken bones.

That was and remains my problem. I care and in some instances a bit too much! What people think about me hardly matters to me, except when they can knowingly say that I gossiped and demeaned them. Getting hurt or being the cause of someone's pain is the last thing I want to do. Hence it is my style to be totally honest with others - to their faces.

It was not always like that and, in all honesty, there are times now that I catch myself midstream or about to lift off on Runway Gossip!

Gossiping sort of sneaks up on you.

Mindfulness is the best curative act or state of being for this insidious behaviour.

As recently as last week, I had to call an urgent team meeting as Gossip had gotten loose in our midst. Not liking my approach, which is focussed and professional, to meeting our targets and helping our organization adept to the new technological environment, an older member of staff decided to set her tongue a wagging!

Image: mkalty.com

One of her colleagues, God bless her soul, inadvertently joined in the chatter about me. I say inadvertently as this woman is the kindest person ever if not a bit - let us say easily distracted. Hoping to have allies in her battle to get me fired, the Gossip, came in one day to go to war with me.

Little did she know that I am not the proverbial "angry black woman," so refused to engage her. Totally dissatisfied with my lackluster performance (thank heavens we were not having sex) she headed to my boss to share all the gossip she had gathered.

My openness is not restricted to my personal life but in my professional one as well. So as the Gossip caught my boss, ready to pour the juice, she was met with "Hmmm, that's odd as Claudette and I discussed these new procedures and I gave her the nod!"

One thing that I have learnt over my 'career' as a gossip is that it never ends well. In the end, the Gossip drinks 'the juice'. Having drunken gallons of said juice, overindulging on other's seeming shortcomings, failures and, yes pain, I learnt my lesson years ago.

Should someone tell you that Claudette said this or that about you, do two things: 1. Check the source of the information and 2. Advise them that she told you already as I would have.

"How would your life be different if…You walked away from gossip and verbal defamation? Let today be the day…You speak only the good you know of other people and encourage others to do the same." Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free

Speaking behind a person's back is not my style. Is it yours? Share your gossiping history with us here or on Facebook page.

Have an awesome rest of the day!