Four Essentials Of An Expanded Life

"Expansion: the action of becoming larger or more extensive. Synonyms:  growth, increase in size, enlargement, extension, development."

Sometime very early in January, I declared 2015 the year of expansion. This was a deliberate act on my part as, like many others, I used to look at the year in passing and give it a name.

"That was the worse year."

"2006 was a rough year."

"Phew, I'm glad that @#%& year is over!"

Being a person who has come to witness and therefore believe that whatever you consistently focus on becomes one's reality, I decided to set my attention and intention for my year. No longer am I willing to live unconsciously or allow another person or society to determine the progression of my life.

Yesterday I shared with my Facebook friends a picture of my mini vision board. This exercise is very central to my way of living - has been for years now with varying degrees of "success" from everything coming to me as envisioned, easily and effortlessly or everything going exactly opposite to my imagining.

This could be no more true than with my relationships, particularly intimate ones. I remember one New Year's Eve posting a picture of me in a wedding gown, getting married to a gorgeous Bruce Willis looking man. Well, would you believe that I did marry a bald headed guy wearing a lovely gown, tiara and all, surrounded by my best friends and my daughter? Would you believe that two years later it was over?

That was one of if not my most profound lessons on Law of Attraction, visualization and relationships - three in one.

Lesson: The Universe will bring you what you predominantly FEEL as you focus consciously or unconsciously.

I attracted the person I was seeing with my eyes but as my predominate feelings around relationships and marriage were: they do not work, I am not good in them, men are abusive, etc., that is exactly what came with the handsome man.

Having learned my lesson, through that situation and a few more after (my head can be quite tough), I cleaned house and changed my focal point.

I turned to my heart.

Over the next few years, from 2010 to 2014, my focus became love. Yes, I have always loved and wanted relationships that are loving but the challenge was I never really knew the type of loving that would attract to me the life, friendships, family bond and even work that I truly wanted.

Unconditional love was something I had to learn, then walk.

I had encountered Her before and that is how I knew what was missing. This time it would take me to bring her back into my experience. The first step was crucial as I had to unconditionally love me first - for all the places, all the things, all the wrong and all the right that I had been and done.

Twenty-fourteen things started shifting. Come December 31, 2014, as I snuggled with my granddaughter on New Year's Eve, it became clear to me that the new year was my time to enlarge, develop more and extend into Me.

Work, money for my needs, the few stuff that I like and empowering platonic friendships have come and continue to flow. Now it is time expand into a spiritual partnership that befits all that I am.

My core understanding and my experiences have taught me that you get not only what you focus on and talk about most but what:

1. You feel and believe to be true
2. You think you deserve
3. You are ready to accept and embrace
4. You hold lightly

Some of us talk a good talk of poverty, poor health, distress, bad relationships and hatred. I was one of them. Now, and for sometime now, I have been feeling, believing and KNOWING that I deserve only the best as I see it.

I am ready to embrace all that makes my heart sing. Are you? Will this be your expansion year? What are you ready to feel, accept and embrace as yours, and hold lightly?

Feel free to drop me a line, comment here or on my Facebook page if you need some practical tips.

Have a lovely and expanding rest of the day.

Claudette

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Drama, Your Days Are Numbered!

Years ago, I had the privilege of working with a very prominent woman in the Jamaican society. Very few could come close to her with name recognition both locally and internationally.

It was not my first time working alongside her. My first up close and personal meeting with her was in my teens. During my twenties, I volunteered and was later hired part time with an organization where she was extremely close to the top. Our paths crossed many times but it was not until my thirties that my connection became up close and personal.

The timing could not have been better as it was just right after I received my invitation to The Big Dance. As it turned out, she would be one of my early chaperones to the event.

I was at the point in my life where my drama debt was piling up. Bankruptcy was still not imminent but my sanity was severely threatened and my health was deteriorating. She clearly knew something was wrong with me but it was not until one morning when I turned up for work at her home office, distraught bordering on dishevelled looking, that she challenged me.

By then I was a "Truth" student, enrolled in actual classes for enlightenment. My awakening had begun so when what would be considered by some as harsh words came from her mouth, I heard as the voice of Truth.

"Claudette, you have signed up for the role of supporting actress in your mother's drama. You are at breaking point now. You have and always had choices. Only you know what will work best for you moving forward but obviously this role is killing you - physically, financially and spiritually. The only fully functioning aspect of you right in this moment is your mental capacity. Let it lead you to the solution. Get off the stage!"

This chaperone was no stranger to acting or drama, having lived a life full of both and since our conversation, has completed and published the book that I was there helping type the first chapters.

I did not immediately cut up my drama card. For almost a decade, I continued using it, making minimum payments here and there by cutting out some things and situations out of my life. The big bill though would take much longer to either pay off or declare bankruptcy.

Eventually I did. Yes, it was painful. People think I am a very strong woman and I am. However, my strength is in my weakness, my ability to open myself up to vulnerability, laying my soul bare, starving my appetite for company, popularity, luxuries, accolades, recognition and even love.

My resignation from the dramatic life was in itself and in part drama! It was my final act.

Now, I live a simple, stress free, love-filled life. Certainly, there are days, moments and/or situations when Drama shows up, expecting to be invited in. Being a human-becoming, I have opened the door from time-to-time and said hello.

My hearing, however, has become highly attuned to the Still Small Voice within me. That Voice never fails to softly remind me that drama will oftentimes wear masks. I have therefore become the mistress of mask removal - mine and that of others.

Where is your drama debt? Ready to turn in the card and clear the debt? If yes, visit me on my page for tips and classes. Also check our Facebook page for additional motivation.

Have a blessed and drama-free day!

Claudette

Let Us Dance!

With age comes wisdom they say but they forgot to add that your "dancing" skills greatly improve.

Furthermore, just to be completely accurate and nondiscriminatory against our youth, not every "aging" person gets more wise or become better "dancers." As well, there are many old souls and Bing Cosby's among our youths.

Having set the record straight, back to the original thought of aging and improved dancing skills.

Now read this carefully:

"Not everyone gets invited to the big dance, only those who are ready for it."

Youth - physical and psychological - is the rehearsal room for the big dance. We get to practice our steps, try out various dance moves and master a few, a couple or one. For some, it will take many years and several parties to get the moves just right. In my experience, it also took many embarrassing moments, flops, inappropriate steps and stepping on many partners' toes for me to finally get my moves just how I like them.

Then the invitation came.

I was only 37 years old in numbers when my invite to the big dance came. At first, I did not recognize that that was it. Frankly, I had given up on dancing. After years of trying, it felt as if it was time to give up. My dancing with family was an abysmal failure. They seemingly preferred to lead and somewhere deep inside of me, I just knew that that music was doing nothing for me.

The people with whom I fell in love were mostly great dancers. There are countless songs that still play in my ears, reminding me of long slow dances in darkened party halls. Somehow, however, we could not transfer those moods, we could not continue dancing into the light.

My dance with strangers, particularly those operating in the financial sphere, was ruinous! I just could not find my groove with them.

When my invite to the big dance turned up, I noticed that there was no date. It simply read:

"Ms Claudette Esterine is cordially invited to The Dance, hosted by Life at Everywhere she is courageous enough to be Herself."

No date, no time and worse of all, no flipping dress code!

Almost 13 years later and I am still dancing:

• To my own heartbeat
• By myself and loving it
• Financially unburdened
• With simple abundance and pure joy.

Will there be a physical dance partner one day? I do not know and that is not my focus. What matters is that I am dancing/living according to and in alignment with my inner band.

Did your invitation come? You might miss it if you are not ready. Let me help you. Visit the DOS Foundation page for topical, motivational and inspirational tips, articles and posts. For more in depth dancing, join me on my professional page and let us get this party started!

Be blessed and dance!


Claudette is the Founder and Editor of DOS Foundation and this blog. She is Jamaican-Canadian and currently lives in Edmonton, Alberta.

2015: Expansion Year - Time To Be CUTE

Towards the end of 2014, I shared a snippet from a conversation that I had with one of my closest DOS Sistahs.

Here is what I posted on December 23:

"I was chatting with one of my Sistahs last night and just before ringing off she said something that had me in stitches.

"My intention for 2015 Claudette is to be cute. My kids and I, we will just be cute!"

As I was hanging up, cackling, I thought carefully about what she said and why. We were musing about people in our lives, those who left because their opinion of us was vibrating on a lower level than our own, finances, travel plans and the relationships that were false starts.

"I'm going to be cute!"

Writing this, it came to me that she meant that instead of allowing any of this to drag her down, my friend was going to remain:
* Calm - as she knows her Source
*  Uniquely herself
*  True to that Self
*   Empowered

Dang! My Sistahs are so profound and CUTE!"

This conversation and the insight that I gained from it has really informed my way of being for 2015. It has had the most impact on my decisions as to my interpersonal and even intimate relationships.

Cuteness has and will continue to inform my professional life as well. I am like many of you in that I have a full time job, working for a not-for-profit organization. The difference between some of you and me might be in the fact that my employment allows me a very good work-life balance.

An important part of my life is what I do, using my formal training, professional and life experiences, is providing support and comfort to those who require it. Years ago, my qualifications to do this was questioned by a former intimate partner. Instead of allowing that to diminish me, my desire to serve and share my journey intensified.

So, throughout 2015, as they say in the land of my birth, Jamaica, my cuteness tun' up!

This is Expansion Year for you and for me and I invite you to hang out and be cute with me! Join me on the DOS Foundation page for topical, motivational and inspirational conversations and quotes. As well, bookmark and *Like* my professional, moonlighting page for practical tips and resources on how to be CUTE in 2015.

Namaste.


Claudette is the Founder of and Personal Coach at DOS Foundation, as well as the main Author and Editor this blog.

Preparing For 2015: Use Your Secret Weapon

Tuesday, December 30, 2014. Are you tired yet of living a life that you are unhappy with?

Well today is the best day to start creating the life you truly desire!

Stay connected with me on our Facebook page, as well as on my personal coaching page at and let us together chart a new course!

Feel free to *like* and share my posts.  Tag your best friend as you would love him/her to enjoy this 'ride' with you!

Be blessed and be a blessing!

Claudette

Preparing For 2015: What Will You Leave Behind

Apologies for the continued absence of regular blog posts. As we continue to #PrepareFor2015, I am finding that this deliberate intention of sorting any residual emotion and stuff that no longer serves me intensifies.

There are a few important to growth things that must be left behind in 2014. What are those for you?

Share with us today in our comment section here.

You can also and always connect with me on our Facebook page. Come on over for regular posts as we sort what is to be left behind but do not trip over the "stuff" that I'm leaving behind!

Namaste