Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts

Friday, 11 April 2014

We Three Queens - Our Biggest Regrets

"What are your biggest regrets - either things you did or those you are sorry you never did?"

That was the question I posed to my fellow authors of this blog. They all "stared" at me blankly - well virtually as we were having a pow-wow via Facebook messenger.

Is it our ages, all over 30 is all I will say, and our memories have failed us as all three pleaded the Fifth!

"I have no regrets," or "I can't think of any," they all chimed or typed. For crying out loud, there must be something, one minute thing you regret?!

They all were going to tell me, "It's blessons," experiences from which they learned huge life lessons. Sure I understood, as how many times they have heard me say, "Regrets? I have none!"

"Think!" I pleaded. Okay, I demanded because this blog post needed to be written and I had no more ideas for this week.

Well, it worked at least with two. Here are our stories. I love my Sistahs, they always pull through:



Karen Jeanette
My biggest regret? Wow, where do I start? 

At the tender age of 12 all I wanted to do was to join the Peace Corps. My two passions in life are helping people and animals.  Joining the Peace Corps felt a natural fulfillment of one. It was something I knew deep down in my heart that I was in fact meant to do.  

This desire was expressed to my Mom on multiple occasions, who in turn, responded with a patronizing "Sure, Karen."  Soon after my 16th birthday, my Mom thought it was time to start planning "my future."

What plan???  I was joining the Peace Corps.  I just did not understand the disconnect. 

To fuel my fire, a few months later I met a young man three years my senior and who had the same aspirations and goals.  This young man (who soon became my fiancee) and I had our future planned out. WE were joining the Peace Corps.

Fast forward to age 17, the "future" discussion reared its ugly head for what would be the last time. My mother was not accepting or approving of said goals and aspirations.  It was her way or the highway.   

Even though I fancied the highway, my mother's disapproval could make it an unpleasant trip.  I am sad and embarrassed to admit that I caved, which was highly out of character for me ~ an otherwise rogue child. Certain she would disown me if I did not graduate from college, I also did not want to disappoint my Mother. 


Compromise: I suggested social work. Well so much for that! "NO," she said.  It was business administration or journalism.  Clearly not a writer, I opted for business administration. 

My acquiescing to Mother continued even after graduating from college. I continued to do what she deemed "best." I did, however, manage to squeeze in my second passion and worked at an animal shelter for a few years. My mother's ordained path was soon embarked upon when I became a senior financial analyst. This would be my career and I worked in this and similar positions in the financial sector for decades.  

Did I find happiness following this route? Not once. My biggest regret is not following my heart.

Clara Brown
It was a beautiful day in Kingston. I hurriedly left my desk and rushed through the office doors, making my way to a radio interview.  I was representing the company that I worked for and the interview was to promote our products and services

As I drove out in the company car, I realized it was low on petrol. The choices were to stop and fill up before getting to the interview or wait until I was returning to the office

It was split second decision. With just a few moments to spare, I stopped to get the petrol.  While I waited to be served, there was a knock on my window. Startled, I looked up to see a very handsome gentleman in a beautiful suit beckoning to me. Somewhere between annoyed and polite, I rolled down my window and inquired, "Can I help you?"

He introduced himself and proceeded to be very complimentary about my car and my appearance.  My Divaship must have jumped out at him and had him stumped. I made polite conversation and shortly after, I was ready to roll.  We exchanged business cards and I made my way to the interview.  I must admit I could not stop thinking about him.

By the next day, we were on the phone constantly talking about everything. Those conversations led to lunch, followed by a drive out to the countryside.  I really enjoyed his company. Those interactions went on for about four months and before I could spell my name it turned into a blossoming romance. 

In the heights of our romance and after meeting my mother things dramatically changed. One day, before putting through the call, the receptionist told me there was a Mrs M. on the phone for me.  My heart skipped a beat for no apparent reason. I knew that my boyfriend and his mother did not share the same last name, so I knew it was not her.  I reluctantly took the call. 

The caller identified herself again and proceeded to discuss her husband (my boyfriend) with me. In spite of my horror, not wanting to discuss such personal matters on the office phone, I decided to meet her.   

To put things into perspective, this call came four years into the relationship. Yet, I questioned my judgement, I questioned my intelligence, I questioned my naivety, I questioned every move from that fateful day at the petrol station.  Needless to say, I broke off the relationship after the meeting with Mrs. M.  She told me of his abuse to her, yet she confessed that she loved her husband and had no intention of leaving the marriage.

It was never my intention to be with someone who I could not trust or who could keep such vital information, like his being married, from me.  I felt used!  Today, Mrs M and I are better friends than I can say of Mr. M.

Nonetheless, despite the "great times" we had, I regret having that relationship.  

Claudette Esterine
Head first and feet flailing in the air. That is how I landed.

We were bored. Someone got a hold of one and within days we were all involved.

After many attempts and arguing about my abilities to get it right, I finally found my comfort zone. We were getting on just fine, slow at first but I was catching a "groove" and things were getting better.

Until that night.

To this day I have no idea why I agreed to go so far. Maybe it was the sound of the waves crashing on the rocks that lulled me into a false sense of calm? My viginity had been taken some time before so this should have been an easy ride.

We went too far.  I knew we had and I begged them to stop but none of them, yes there were two of them, none would listen to me. Instead, they called me a cry baby and just kept going - harder, faster and further.

Exhausted and not sure if I could make it, they agreed to stop. It was time to go home and face the music. There was no way we could deny how far we had gone. The telltale signs were there - out of breath, sweaty and a pungent smell.

It happened on the return home. Pumping hard to get back before the door was closed, I was losing control very quickly. The blaring horns of the last bus of the night from Annotto Bay to Ocho Rios was getting closer.

I panicked. Inches away from me or so it seemed but I dared not look back to confirm, the bus driver thumped on the horn and never raised his fist.

My heart was about to burst from my chest just after my ear drums would splatter and rundown my shirt front. Sensing death was nigh, I did the only thing my scattered brain could think to do.

Image: nowtoronto.com
I veered a sharp left just as we got to the first house and street light in the district. Having no time to notice what was in my path, I landed head first in a garbage can!

The raucous laughter of my two cousins who had led the bicycle trip miles into the neighbouring district, brought everyone out to witness my disgrace!

As they pulled me out, my nickname changed to "Headtop."

It was summer 1975 and I was spending the school break in Oracabessa, St. Mary. My immediate regret was getting on that bicycle in the first place, especially on that narrow and dark rural road.

My second regret - never getting back on a bicycle ever since.

Do you have  story of regret or  blesson that you would like to share with us? Leave a comment here. Please also visit and *Like* our Facebook page. You can also follow us on Twitter and always stay in touch.

Have a great weekend!

Karen Jeanette is a member of the DOS Facebook Group and lives in Arizona, USA with her beautiful family. She is one of our regular Guest Authors.

 Clara Brown is an Insurance Executive and lives in St. Andrew,  Jamaica with her spouse and only child, Jared. She is one of our regular Guest Authors. 

 Claudette Esterine is the Founder of Daughters of Sheba Foundation and Editor of our blog. She is a Jamaican-Canadian and a Free Spirit.

Monday, 31 March 2014

Top Ten Reasons Why I Chose To Be A Vegetarian

Karen Jeanette - Guest Author
I am a firm believer that everyone should live their life according to their own values and personal beliefs. Consequently, this is simply an abridged version of my personal journey to doing the same ~ becoming  “the V word” - a vegetarian.

From my early childhood, I have always felt an innate connection with all types of animals (dogs, cats, birds, pigs, cows, lambs, goats, etc).  I sincerely loved and truly believed that I understood them all!

I was blessed to be born into a home with a kind and loving miniature schnauzer. Growing up as an only child, that dog was my best friend. I truly adored him (and occasionally barked at him ~ don't judge).

My wider family, however, had a 180 degree different perspective than me regarding animals. For example, my Hispanic grandfather and his sons took pleasure in shooting birds off power lines with their BB guns and thought nothing of dog fights. They also enjoyed going crabbing or fishing and having a big cook up of their catch.  

Flower Child with Best Friend Baron
Then there is the Native American side of my family. They, at one point in time, acquired most if not all of their meat either via hunting or farming. At least that is what they told me and for emphasis, did so quite often.   

You can, therefore, understand why my love for animals and desire NOT to eat or harm them in any way did not go over well with my family. Consequently, due to their taunting I was inconsistent with meeting my goal of sticking to strictly vegetarian recipes. My only compromise was to consume as little meat as possible at our dining table.  

After graduating college, I opted to work for a well-known animal shelter in Philadelphia, PA.  As one might suspect, this is my favorite job to date.  While working there, I discovered a treasure trove of information that supported my vegetarian beliefs.

Information regarding the large amount of antibiotics and pesticides used in animal feed, the deplorable factory farm conditions where most of our store bought meat is processed, Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (nicknamed Mad Cows Disease) and the negative environmental impact of raising animals for slaughter all of which strongly supported my desire not to eat meat, not even minimally.

It would later become crystal clear to me that, if I was to be true to myself and my own values, I had to stop eating meat for good.  This was a most difficult decision and one that convinced my family, my Dear Husband and my new in-laws that I am actually from planet Jupiter (or Mars, or Saturn, but surely not from Earth)! The sundresses, sandals and bonnets were just the tip of the iceberg of my true hippie roots.  "Now she is not eating meat?!"

Despite their views about me and my lifestyle choices, this has been the longest that I have not eaten meat (as well as most dairy products) and, excluding my chronic daily migraines, I feel so much better.  My chronic daily migraines were with me long before I became a vegetarian and is a topic for another article.

My Top Ten Reasons?
Meatless Taco
Photo Courtesy of: Phamfatale.com
Although I am quite certain a scientist or a meat advocate could negate each and every one of my reasons, I wanted to share with you my “Top Ten Reasons Why I chose to be a Vegetarian:"
  1. Deplorable factory farm conditions
  2. Less likely to encounter Mad Cow disease, salmonella and E.coli
  3. My compassion for animals and advocacy for them so I cannot eat them
  4. I feel more calm and more spiritually aligned as a vegetarian 
  5.  Consumption of fibre, fruits and veggies has increased 
  6. I feel my body is designed for a vegetarian diet
  7. Doing my part to help to reduce the vast amount of soy and grains consumed by cows
  8. I am contributing to trees being saved from being cleared for cattle ranching or growing crops for cattle feed
  9. I am helping to save our water supply as it takes more water to produce beef than it does to produce wheat
  10. Finally - I feel better about ME!! 
Photo Courtesy of: www.ripe6.net

I have a great deal of respect for everyone’s personal values and beliefs. So please know that whether you choose to eat meat or become a "Perpetual Flower Child" like me and give it up, completely or partially, is up to you. This for me is more about sharing - not preaching - and underscoring the individual choices that we all must make on any subject.  

Being vegetarian was a principled decision for me - to respect my personal values. What choices have you made on that basis, one that probably evoked ridicule from others? Do share with us by leaving a comment here or on our Facebook page. You may also follow us on Twitter. Continue to have a great day and an awesome week ahead.

Namaste. 


Karen Jeanette is a member of the DOS Facebook Group and lives in Arizona, USA with her Dear Husband and son . She is one of our three Guest Authors.